Wear your baby body with pride

I was recently reading a copy of People Magazine and was frustrated and disappointed to come across an article called “Body after Baby”. The article spoke about how Hollywood Mama’s got their sexy bodies back. Beside each celeb pic, none of which by the way resemble any new mother I ever came across, was a big circle showing how long it took each mum to lose the weight. The longest timeline featured was 5 months.

Really? 5 MONTHS? Really?

Should I now feel bad because at 5 months post partum I looked nothing like what I did before my life revolved around diaper changes and breastfeeding.

I am so tired of reading article after article and seeing picture after picture of women, or specifically celebs, getting praise for looking sexy again the minute they walk out of the hospital. Why is this even a story at all let alone something that is taking up 4 entire pages of a magazine??? Why am I not reading articles about their wonderful journey into motherhood? How their lives have changed? Their ups and downs. Why are these magazines not praising these women for the ways they are striving to ensure they can be positive role models for their children? Ways in which they are embracing their new role of mother? I guess it’s more important for us to know how long it took for them to get back into their skinny jeans.

Let me point out that every single mother in the article is in their 30’s. Not young 20 something’s whose bodies bounce back a whole heck of a lot easier. But women who are in their 30’s when things just begin to get a little more difficult.

 I call bullshit! Who wants to join me??? I don’t buy that it was THAT easy for each and every one of them to lose the weight. Even if it was, what is the point of this article? To give a pat on the back for working out 3 hours a day and paying ridiculous amounts of money for diet food to be delivered to you daily? Yay!! Good for you Jenna Dewan-Tatum you lost it all in 2 months!  Do you feel better now that you and your little celeb friends have made the real women out there reading this article feel just a little bit worse about themselves? Women who have to work 9-5’s, clean houses, cook dinners, take care of their families. Women who don’t have stylists, makeup artists, professional hair dressers or meal delivery services? Women who are looking at these pictures of you, which may or may not have been taken post partum, and are wondering why they don’t look like they did before they had kids?

What happened to the whole it took 9 months to put it on theory? Why is it considered a great success to not look like you ever had a baby just days after giving birth? Or worse yet, while your pregnant? Is it really a compliment when someone says “You don’t even look like you just had a baby” or “I wouldn’t know you were pregnant from behind”. That shouldn’t be compliment. The praise I’d rather hear is how I’m doing a great job as a mother, not thumbs up for looking hot again!

How have we turned pregnancy and child birth into another way to judge ourselves on the way we look? I challenge us all to fight back against this. I do not want to read another article about how wonderful a celebrity is just because she’s lost all her baby weight within hours of giving birth. Please aren’t we better than this? We are more than just a number on the scale. Motherhood is about more than just pounds gained and pounds lost.  When are we going to stop putting such high importance on our outward appearance?

If it took you two months, two years or if you’ve accepted the fact that your body will never be the same, wear your baby body with pride. You will never get back the time you spend stressing about your body. Own in, accept it, love it. It’s a part of your journey into the wonderful world of motherhood.

My take on a new trend

Finally!! I recently read an article about the new “push present” trend that really sparked me.

I can’t remember the first time I heard the term push present but I do remember thinking it had to be a joke. Where am I?? In Kim Kardashian land??? There can’t really be women, I mean real women, out there who demand a present to push out a baby. Can there? The bigger question to me is, am I the only one who feels like this is a little much? The article showed me that I’m not the only one who feels that this is a trend that needs to go away.

You can find the article here:  http://www.blogher.com/enough-push-presents

Now let me make myself clear. For a husband, a mother, or a sibing or another close relative to give a present to the mother to be, to comemorate the occasion is not an issue in itself. We, as a society celebrate occassions. For example, we celebrate our highschool graduation, university graduation, our engagements, our wedding day with gifts, why can’t we celebrate the birth of a child by giving a present? THere is nothing wrong with giving a gift to celebrate the occassion. It’s actually a nice thought to give something that can be kept as a memory, as a reminder of such a beautiful moment. My mother gave me a beautiful bracelet when my son was born. She gave it as a keepsake, as a thank you for sharing the delivery with her. I have it as a memory. A memory of the birth of my first child. A reminder of a wonderful moment that I shared with two of the most important people in my life (before my children), my husband and my mother. I don’t see a present as a problem.

The first problem I have with the whole idea of a push present is with a woman demanding a present to “push” out her baby. Honestly?? The article, is 100% right in that it totally perpetuates the sterotype of women being materialistic. You need a purse or a diamond because you did such a good job and deserve something nice for it? Women have been giving birth since the beginning of time and all of a sudden we need a prezzie as a pat on the back, something to say good for you? This to me just falls into our sense of entitlement. What happened to bathing in love for your new beautiful little bundle? Now that love must be bathed in the bling of a brand new diamond ring?

The second issue I have with it is the term “push present” The term itself does insinuate that the present is for the act of pushing out the baby. It does not imply that it’s something as a memory of the occassion. I mean how can a Coach purse be a way to remember such a wonderful occassion? If you get your partner a present why does it have to be called a push present?

The whole idea of it to me is just a sign of where our society is right now. The selfishness, the materialism, the excess. I agree with Kristine when she says enough already!

I am the mother of two. My two babies were the best presents I could ever ask for.  I’m glad I finally read something that is pointing out how silly this new trend really is. Note to Mr. C, if we do decide to go for # 3…no push present required 🙂